Tips for Moving Forward After Divorce

The end of a marriage is often unpleasant. Irreconcilable differences and abuse are a few common reasons cited by divorcing couples. It leads to disruptions in the lifestyle of families. Also, it takes an emotional toll on involved parties. Read on to identify four tips that will help you move forward after a divorce.

Take Time to Grieve

Divorce is different from losing a loved one. Yet, the grieving process still applies during and after the divorce. Take time to grieve the failure of your marriage and the shared hopes and dreams that are no more. Everyone handles grief differently, depending on their situation. There are five stages of grief. The first one involves denial. It appears in many forms depending on who initiated the proceedings.

After realizing the divorce is real, shock sets in, and you are in disbelief about the marriage coming to an end. The third emotional stage of divorce is anger. The onset of anger can happen many times. Some experience self-anger about letting things get out of hand or at their soon-to-be-ex. You may even be angry at the world and whatever situation that contributed to the divorce.

Next comes the negotiation stage. This process can be costly based on the method of terminating the marriage. It can be through one of three ways: legal separation and contested or uncontested divorce. The latter is the least costly. This is because spouses agree on the terms of the divorce and sign all necessary documents beforehand. The final stage is acceptance. You have overcome the rollercoaster of emotions and are ready to move on.


In a marriage, the lifestyles of spouses are intertwined. This changes after a divorce since you no longer have to run choices by them. Rediscover your interests and what makes you happy. There are things that you probably held back on doing while you were married. Now that you are divorced, take them up. It could be taking new classes or even changing your wardrobe. Maybe you have put a hobby on hiatus since your ex-spouse disapproved; go back to it. Create a list of activities that interest you and jump right in.

Loneliness is also an aftermath of divorce. Pick useful activities like journaling to fill the void of loneliness. Rather than rebounding, be purposeful in getting into new relationships. Couples that take at least three years dating before getting engaged build a stronger foundation for their marriage. This is evidenced by a 39% less chance of getting a divorce compared to their counterparts who went out no later than a year. Instant gratification rarely ends well.

Get a Support System

Divorce is an emotionally taxing process. Resulting lifestyle changes can put you down. But, you do not have to go through it alone. Surround yourself with people that care for you. Reach out to friends and family, and accept the help they extend. Talk to them about difficult feelings. Also, change the relationships that do not serve you.

Consider joining a support group. In the U.S., divorce cases are on the rise. Nearly 45% of all first marriages end up failing. If the statistics are anything to go by, many people have been through a divorce. Talking to such people can help with the transition.

Additionally, talk to a mental health professional. They will help you ease the trauma. It could be in person or via online therapy sites.

Perform Your Responsibilities

A divorce does not mean the end of responsibilities. Make an appointment with a financial expert to advise you on how to fulfill your financial obligations. These are as required by the divorce decree. Some decrees require a qualified domestic relations order (QDRO). Contact the plan administrator to ensure it is fulfilled. Also, sign off any relevant documents and deeds. To prevent fraud, separate bank accounts and change all your passwords. There are also other things that you’ll need to work out such as auto and health insurance. When looking for affordable full coverage auto insurance, make sure you’re getting more than one quote. That way you can weigh out all your options.

To move on after a divorce, go through the grief motions. These include denial, anger, and acceptance. Also, get your finances in order and work on rediscovering yourself.